How to Run Better One-on-One Meetings: A Practical Guide for Managers
Updated: 7 days ago
By Paul Gerhardt, PhD, management professor, leadership author, and host of The Better Workplace.
A calendar full of one-on-one meetings does not guarantee that employees feel heard. The useful question is what becomes clearer, easier, or more manageable because the conversation happened.
For managers and supervisors, a good one-on-one creates room to discuss priorities, obstacles, feedback, and development. Here is a practical structure you can adapt for your next conversation.
Start with the employee’s agenda
Send a short invitation beforehand: What would make this conversation useful for you? Give the person a chance to name a concern before presenting your own list. Keep routine project updates brief so they do not consume the entire meeting.
I suggest protecting 20 to 30 minutes as a starting point, then adjusting the frequency and length together. A new employee, a changing assignment, or a difficult period may call for more frequent conversations. This is a suggested approach, not a universal rule.
Use a simple 25-minute one-on-one agenda
First 5 minutes: Ask what needs attention and listen without rushing to an answer.
Next 10 minutes: Discuss priorities, workload, and obstacles. Agree on what matters most.
Next 5 minutes: Talk about feedback, learning, or a skill the employee wants to practice.
Final 5 minutes: Confirm the next actions, who owns them, and when you will follow up.
Treat the agenda as a guide. If a serious concern emerges, slow down and address it rather than mechanically moving to the next item.
Ask questions that lead to useful decisions
Choose two or three questions for a conversation. A long checklist can make the meeting feel like an interview.
Which priority needs the most clarity from me?
What is taking more time or effort than we planned?
What could we stop, delay, or simplify?
Where would more authority, information, or support help?
What would you like an opportunity to learn or practice?
What should I do differently to support your work?
The Center for Creative Leadership’s guidance for managers supporting leadership development emphasizes making room for learning, discussing obstacles, and exchanging feedback about observable behavior. The meeting structure here is my practical suggestion, not a validated CCL model.
Listen before you solve
When someone describes a difficulty, resist filling every pause. Summarize what you heard and ask whether you understood it correctly. Then ask what the employee has considered and what kind of help would be useful.
Consider this hypothetical example: An employee is missing internal deadlines because three people keep adding urgent requests. A conversation about working faster may miss the problem. Reviewing those requests together could reveal that priorities need to be resolved by the manager.
You might agree to one clear order of priorities, a decision about what can wait, and a way to handle new requests. The value comes from changing the conditions that created confusion.
Close with commitments on both sides
Write a brief, shared record of the actions you agreed to take. Keep it proportionate: one or two commitments may be enough. Record work decisions and follow-up dates without collecting unnecessary personal information.
The manager should leave with responsibilities too. If you promised to clarify a deadline, remove a barrier, or find an answer, make that visible at the next meeting. If an issue requires someone else’s decision, explain who you will consult and when you expect an update.
Try this at your next meeting
Ask the employee to identify one obstacle. Listen until you can describe it accurately, agree on one action within your control, and schedule a check on what changed. That gives both of you something concrete to assess.
A shared action record for your next one-on-one
Before leaving, complete these lines together:
Employee's next action: [action and date].
Manager's next action: [support or decision and date].
Priority tradeoff: [what can wait, if needed].
Review: [when to check what changed].
If the conversation is repeatedly postponed, agree on a replacement time. Predictable access matters more than a meeting that stays on the calendar but rarely happens.
Paul Gerhardt, PhD, teaches management and leadership with a practical commitment to helping people build better workplaces. The examples and exercises in this article are teaching illustrations, unless identified as research findings.
Related leadership lessons
For a story about difficult conversations, employee accountability, and rebuilding workplace trust, explore Professor G’s Guide to The Conversation Nobody Wants.
If a one-on-one needs to address a missed commitment, The Conversation Nobody Wants follows a manager through the preparation, discussion, and follow-up.
Practical leadership lessons, once a month
Keep improving the conversations that shape your workplace. Subscribe free to The Better Workplace Monthly Lessons for practical leadership insights and updates on books and resources.
Comments